Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Just too special for earth.

Today has been an emotionally draining day for me. As you see by my hurried and not so pretty post from yesterday, my dear friend Nancy had been in the hospital with her twin yet-to-be-born daughters in peril. Even through the prayers from every corner of the earth her sweet babies were delivered and went straight on up to heaven at 22 weeks and 1 day.

The sorrow I feel for Nancy her husband and their daughter is engulfing me. Her contractions broke through all meds and the babies were delivered. I am in awe of all that Nancy did to give these little girls the best chance. She had been in bed half upside down for weeks. She would have done it for months if she could have. The love of a Mother to her babies is an incredible thing. God gave us such capacity to love and nurture, and such depth of sorrow when we loose our children. Her babies were born still so they didn't struggle, she has great peace in that. She and her husband got to hold, cuddle the girls, and have them blessed. Those were all important to her and blessings that she will cling to in the days ahead. They are grieving for babies that should be tucked away safe growing and meeting them in November.

I feel angry that these tiny lives loved and wanted so much are taken so soon. I know that they are "better off" in heaven........ but their broken families are in such pain. I know for us when we lost Mackenzie I felt like the world had just fell apart. I couldn't understand how any good could ever come from me loosing my baby. Now, although I still would love to have her here with us I can see that she has made a difference in many lives and without loosing her we would have never had Kendall. So I have to wait awhile to hold her in my arms but she will always be my daughter. Anyway, I guess the long and short of it is those sweet babies were here for only a moment.

I feel so broken for Nancy and her family, but I know that they will all be together again, they were just too special for earth.

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